Family Ties, Eternal Hope: Linda’s Story

As Told By Linda Mandrayar

For some time now, I’ve been the anchor for the Regency Retirement Home in Fallbrook, California. My journey with Loving the Wise started because of a deep, personal concern. My parents had recently moved into assisted living, and it weighed on my heart: Would they still be able to go to church?

They were longtime Christians, always involved in their faith, but as they hit their nineties, things were changing. My mother was struggling with dementia, and my father, who had always been my spiritual mentor, seemed disconnected. He was drifting in a way that shocked me to my core, even voicing seasons of doubt about the afterlife. I was frightened for them, and I knew I couldn't just visit; I had to bring the light back into their hallway.

When I first heard about Loving the Wise and how they bring hymns to seniors, I was intimidated. I told Beth, the volunteer who came to mentor me, "I don’t know how to play any instruments, and I’m really not a very good singer." But Beth showed me how Loving the Wise has streamlined everything.

She showed me the songbooks with beautiful hymns in large print and the "secret weapon": Spotify. The ministry has curated every hymn into professional accompaniment tracks. All I had to do was bring a little portable speaker and use my phone.

It takes all the pressure off. Because the music is right there, it’s almost like karaoke for the soul. You don’t have to be a performer; you’re just a facilitator, helping these beautiful songs come to life for people who need them. Seeing how simple it was gave me the confidence to say, "Yeah, I can do this!"

One of the things I love most is that this ministry gave me a real purpose to be at the Regency every Sunday. It’s like when your kids are in school and you volunteer in the classroom. You’re not just a visitor; you’re involved. You get an inside view of the facility. I got to know the staff, and they began to trust me. Working in these centers is a hard job, and I found that the music cheered them up, too. They’d hear it in the hallways and feel comforted. It turned the facility into a family environment, and I felt so much better knowing the people who were surrounding my parents every day.

We eventually took the program into Memory Care, where the dementia is more severe. It is a miracle to witness: people who can't remember what they had for lunch will suddenly light up and sing every word to Amazing Grace. We’ve seen the music pull people in who hadn’t been to church in years. There’s a gentleman named Ron who stayed away from church his whole adult life, but when he heard us singing, he remembered those hymns. Now, he’s our strongest singer and comes every week. We even have people who were never believers come just for the fellowship. They are seeking companionship, and they find it in these songs.

The most important part of this story is what happened with my father. Before we started this, he had gone through a season of doubt that was very unsettling for me. But bringing these hymns into his weekly routine changed everything. He started reading his Bible again and got reconnected to his spiritual side. The day before he passed away, I was staying with him. He told me he’d had a vision of our family in heaven. He said, "Linda, I’m not afraid. It’s going to be amazing." A few months prior, I don't think he could have said that. He passed away the next day, and I am so thankful he was reconnected to the Lord through these songs before he went.

What makes this journey even more special is that you’re not on your own. There’s a whole team behind Loving the Wise, including volunteers leading groups at other facilities who meet monthly on a Zoom call to pray for each other. We support one another, share specific prayer requests for the residents, and connect as a family of believers from all denominations. I’ve been so encouraged by these meetings; it takes the weight off your shoulders when you know others are lifting you and your ministry up in prayer.

We have to remember that for many of these residents, this is the last place they will live. They are right there at Heaven’s Gate, longing for someone to talk to them and love on them. Because it’s so simple, anyone can do this. You don’t need a golden voice; you just need a heart for people. I’ve seen residents pass away since I started, and while it’s sad, there is nothing better than knowing they found their way back to God before they passed. It has grown my own faith, and it is the most rewarding way I know to give back. If your parents are in assisted living, I highly recommend starting a chapter. It’s a blessing for them, but honestly, it’s just as big a blessing for you.

If you have a loved one in assisted living, or simply a desire to serve, would you consider starting a weekly Loving the Wise gathering?